Blessings to My Mom
Margaret Ella Smithson Fann, born August 29, 1939, grew up in Bethesda, Tennessee. She was the fourth child in a family of seven siblings. To me she was, Mom; to her grandchildren, Nana; to some, Aunt Margaret and to many, many others, friend.
On October 31, 2012, her soul and spirit moved from the temporal to the eternal. Each year on this day, I look for ways to honor her life and memory. As I also pause today to reflect on the remarkable woman I called mom, here are some of the things that stand out for me.
Mom faced many difficulties throughout her life, but chose to live a life marked by faith, generosity, and love. She earned her GED after raising two children and then enrolled in college classes at Middle Tennessee State University. She was a published writer, a Bible teacher for teenage girls, young women and later senior women at Bible Study Fellowship. An amazing seamstress, she provided clothes for her children and grandchildren as well as creating stuffed bears and rabbits which were sold at a local boutique store. Her skills were also noted in the kitchen as she graciously served hot breakfasts (eggs, biscuits and gravy) to us each time we came to visit (and growing up as well) and made the best fried chicken and pecan pie in the south.
Mom was an incredible daughter to her aging mother, caring for her consistently until death took her away in June of 1990. Her loving spirit was also shared with women in the county prison where she started a Bible study as well as the local Crisis Pregnancy Center where she poured unconditional love and acceptance into the lives of frightened young women.
Her hospitality in our home stretched from her mom and siblings to the homeless child and foster teenager with no place to go. Her door was always open and an extra seat at the table always welcome. I saw her kindness demonstrated often in the belief that every single person is uniquely created and lovable, whether that person was the cashier at the grocery store or the teenage girl “unexpectedly” pregnant or the senior living alone down the street.
To her children, she taught vital lessons of faith and family. With her grandchildren, she was always ready to play pretend or available for a game of chinese checkers or putt putt golf. Nana enjoyed writing with them stories they could enjoy and share. She volunteered at their schools and enjoyed visiting for lunch whenever she could. She was supportive and present. Mom desired that each know her heritage, the good and the bad, so that her life lessons might translate into blessings for generations to come so she left us with stacks of personal prose, poetry and stories to keep and share.
Even as Alzheimers slowly took its toll on her mind from 2004 to 2012, she would start each day with the Bible open at the table as she ate her Special K cereal each morning. Her faith in God never wavered and her love for others never ceased. During the last year of her life as we would walk around the facility where she spent her time, she would pause and reach out to another resident saying, “I love you.” Her last few months were at a local nursing home as the disease progressed. Even here, she always remembered to say I love you. I arrived there less than 24 hours before Mom went to be with our Lord Jesus. The nurse hugged me as I approached and told me she had crawled into the bed with mom the night before and my mom’s last spoken words were, “I love you.” She whispered to me, “She’s waiting for you.”
I climbed into her bed that night and held her in my arms, speaking words of love to her. Her eyes would move back and forth so I knew she was hearing my voice. In the wee hours of the morning, her breathing relaxed into a rhythm. A few hours later, I sat beside her and watched as her eyes stopped moving behind the thin eyelids and her breaths became more labored and further apart. The time was near for life on this earth as we had experienced to end. Leaning close, I whispered into her ear, “Thank you, Mom, for teaching me about faith, for being my friend and giving me life. I will never stop loving you.” A deep gasp and life departed from her frail body.
I continue to seek to honor her through my own acts of generosity and kindness to those I encounter on this life’s journey. In each person, I want to see who they are in the eyes of God and be available for God to use me along the way. Like my mom, I want to sow love and grace into the lives of others.
Shortly after my breast cancer diagnosis in the spring of 2016, in the very early morning hours, I was kneeling in prayer seeking strength from God. He gave me a vision of mom with our Lord Jesus who was looking at mom with the greatest pleasure. She was dancing before him full of laughter and joy. He assured her as he assured me that day that I am in his care and always in her prayers. Forever, I am my mother’s daughter and for eternity, a child of the Father.
A deep gratitude to my mom for how deeply she influenced my life. Blessings to all whom my mom touched with her life over her time here on earth with us. Selah.
